How to end up handcuffed backstage at a REO Speedwagon concert.

The Essential REO Speedwagon
The Essential REO Speedwagon (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I need some kind of rock n roll diploma to hang by my computer to justify me as a blogger of rock music; so I will tell this story from 1982.

My taste in music is not always as good as I think- now or in the past

Case in point:

 I once was an REO Speedwagon fanatic.

I am not proud of this but I admit that I may still own the entire REO Speedwagon catalogue. (at least up until the incident in the title)…yes, even those obscure records before Kevin Cronin took over as lead singer-And it gets worse:

I proudly wore a R.E.O belt buckle that I bought at the county fair. Back in the good ol’ days when copyright infringement was not farmed out to Asian countries; we made quality fake stuff right here in the U.S.A!!

While my friends were listening to Pink Floyd and Kiss- I was way ahead of the curve on pure grain-fed Midwestern formula paint by numbers watered down blues. (In my defense- “You can tune a piano but you can’t tuna fish” is not a bad record)

And then R.E.O abandoned their  rock n’ roll roots and became the biggest pop/rock band in America with the release of Hi Infidelity.  

This was the biggest selling rock album in America In 1982.

And that is when I met my heroes in a bar…and ended up in handcuffs backstage at their sold-out show.

And you probably won’t believe this story.

I had connections that got me great seats to concerts at the Saratoga Performing Arts Center in N.Y

On my list of shows that year was R.E.O Speedwagon.

I had planned to take a girl friend but that required finding a girl and having her remain in “active girl friend status” at the time of this show- I had two months to make this happen but as an awkward, nerdy and slightly weird young adult- fate was stacked against me- I had great seats and no date a couple days before the show. I sold my tickets to some happy couple for no profit.

Plus the band was a riot of popularity as mega stars and my infatuation with them was rapidly fading. I told myself they had sold-out.

On the night before the show I am sitting in a bar in downtown Saratoga Springs- It is 1am and the bar band is playing- there are maybe 12 of us in there and the owner of said establishment has stopped collecting the 2 dollar cover charge.

Who walks in but Kevin Cronin, Gary Richrath and one other dude from R.E.O (maybe the drummer?- I guess I need help from one of the other eleven in the bar that night to help me remember?)

They walk to the stage and rip into “Johnny Be Good” with a couple members of the bar band- They did play a couple more songs before departing and I remember slapping Kevin Cronin on the back and saying thanks as they walked out (BTW-he does not like that- just in case you get in range)

But how cool is the biggest band on the planet just going back and playing for fun?

I should have left it right there, but:

Night of the show I am hanging outside the gates at the Performing Arts Center because I have no tickets…some go jumping over the fence and I join them to sneak in.

A security guard chases me and I run away—I am fast but the guard is faster and tackles me in a spectacular dive which could have made the top ten on Sports Center. The crowd loved it!

I am handcuffed and put on a golf cart with other criminals to be processed. They do the processing backstage at the show—which is kind of ironic because that is closer than any of us dreamed of getting.

One scary dude handcuffed to a locker and is yelling obscenities and insults at me largely because I am dressed like a geek. I realize 3 things at that moment:

  1. I am a geek and even getting arrested with people does not automatically make me “cool” with those people.
  2. I am going to be calm and make good decisions from this point forward so that I don’t end up going to jail.
  3. Damn, that guard was fast! He must do a 4.1 time on the forty yard dash!

Thankfully- I was issued a ticket and released- It was a 50 dollar fine.

Soon after this I would get seriously in to more underground music.

And 30 years later I would start a blog.

Any questions?

Frank Turner.I Still Believe

Frank Turner.I Still Believe

I have posted this before and will probably post it again.

This song says in a few short words what my blog is trying to say in a bunch of long words over an extended period of time at a rate of about twice a week.

Music -for the people, by the people and of the people. (sorry and thank you to Ben Franklin or whoever wrote that first)

And by people –I mean all people-even people that grow up with the stain of privilege like Mr. Turner. (Seriously dude, Eton college with Prince William?) Not the expected training for a post-punk folk revival demi-saint  of music. But -So What, welcome and thank you!

Woodstock- A true Rock n’ Roll Wonder on Father’s Day

fathers-day-2013-fb

Here is a Father’s day photo of my youngest son and I at the site of the original Woodstock Stage. Yes, this is where Jimi played the Star Spangled Banner and Janis sung her heart out. And yes, this was a great trip to take!

I will write more and add it to my list of Rock n Roll wonders but for now I will enjoy the rest of Dad’s day with my great family!

And I have to thank  http://jumpforjoyphotoproject.wordpress.com/ for putting this idea into my head-great blog with people just jumping for joy!

Daft Punk quickly taking over the summer of 2013

Get Lucky is everywhere- causing the kids to dance and the old people to turn up the radios in their hover-rounds and move whatever still works.

Call it house or electronic or just very polished and cool dance music– it has that rare “everyone likes” quality. Cool lemonade on a hot day…it’s just what we need in troubled times. Bubbling feel-good funk is infused with Pharrell Williams and Nile Rodgers getting sucked into this electronic vortex of clean production.

Daft Punk are quirky arty anti-stars- they are true to their vision. This brings in the hipsters and breaks the ice with alternative rockers.

Daft Punk wear those crazy helmets and have no problem translating to the world of animation. Gamers, geeks and nerds can relate.

The techno- freaks in the clubs were already fans and have no reason to abandon their robot heroes.

Even a stodgy old rock n’ roll blogger like myself is able to get infected by these disco man/machine divas of sophisticated swag.

That must tell you something.

I encourage all classic rock fans to give up their preconceived ideas on funk , disco and electronic music and just give in to this one. You are going to be bombarded by it from everywhere anyway so why not just enjoy it? It took a few listens to wear me down, (O.K, more than a few) but it’s got me now.

And for those few die-hards (Ok, more than a few) that will argue StyxMr Roboto” as the ultimate rock music techno hit of all time. It is time to abandon all hope and find an 8-track player to install for your camaro ride to hell. It is over for you.  You are now officially the burnt toast of a former generation.

Join everyone else and just let go- that is what music can do at its best. What is the worse that can happen?

 

 

 

 

 

You are never too old to Rock n’ Roll?

After attending community college part-time for longer than I want to admit and finally finishing my degree, I have learned a couple things about getting old:

  1. I am now old…A.A.R.P wants me as a member! Jamie Lee Curtis wants me to eat Greek yogurt (and I am thinking about it)
  2. So what

When you take classes with kids often half your age, you do reach a point where you just have to get over yourself and get on with it or risk not making it to the end. No one really cares about age more than yourself…As long as you focus on what you have to do and not worry about anything else, you will be O.K. That is basically it. Age only knocks you out if you let it- you can not stop it but you can stare it down until the very end.

So here is my little Rock Opera on the 5 stages of aging according to the Cave

Act  1: Denial- Forever Young

David Bowie.Changes

“Look out you Rock n rollers, pretty soon you’re gonna get older”

I did not believe this wise oracle of rock the first time I heard this line. I thought I would stay young forever. David Bowie saw it coming and tried to warn us.

Act 2: Feel it slipping-try to get it back-Slight desperation-

Weezer.The Good Life

“And I don’t wanna be an old man anymore. It’s been a year or two since I was out on the floor.
Shaking booty, making sweet love all the night…It’s time I got back to the good life”

You sense it is fading but still don’t have a grasp on it

Act 3: Wallow in memories-it may be over

Rolling Stones.Memory Motel

When Keith Richards does his vocal bit-it just takes this to another level- this is my favorite Rolling Stones song and it may be a straight-ahead country music tune. It’s got memories and pick-up trucks in it. This is a drinking song!

Age does build up a reservoir of hurt feelings to go immerse yourself in. It might seem like nice warm water, but you only need a few inches to drown in- and tears and beer can make this get to a level that will break those levees around your heart in no time. …But having said that…Wow!-this is a great song!

Act 4: Acceptance- Oh no- this is real! And happening to a person near me…in fact me, myself!

Peter Gabriel. My Body is a Cage

‘My body is a cage, it keeps me from dancing with the one I love”

When I saw Peter Gabriel perform this live in 2011, I was knocked right on my ass. The intensity he brought to this Arcade Fire song was something to watch erupt on stage. What I took away was this guy trapped in his 63 year-old body but still giving everything he had. The spirit is strong but the vehicle it operates in is getting worn. You could see it happening, and like only genius artists can do…you could feel it happening. There was this transference of emotion from the stage to the audience.

 Act 5: So what- it happens to the best of us and the worst of us-I still choose to rock n roll

Little Feat.Old Folks Boogie

“You know that you’re over the hill when your mind makes a promise that your body can’t fill”

So you’re old!!—-Enjoy yourself—it will happen to the best of us in the end if we are lucky enough to make it that far.

The passage of time and the relentless scourge of gravity will hunt us down like dogs. We will be history to future generations. So let us rock while we still can!

Wonder #5, Cleveland Rocks! Alan Freed + Ian Hunter + Me-frozen like a chipmunk

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Wonder #5- Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

A city can’t just proclaim itself worthy of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and become the real home of Rock Music and its history…just like that…something out of nothing….Going all Kevin Costner in Field of Dreams-“just build it and they will come”

Can it?

Isn’t the audacity to proclaim yourself something and then go out and do it-the whole point of Rock Music!!!

In 1951, when it did not have a name, this upstart disk jockey Alan Freed on Cleveland WJW radio named Rock and Roll. It may not have been birthed in Cleveland, but that is where it got packaged so it could take over the world. This new name rebranded R&B music and opened the door to all American kids in a big way.

We are not done yet

Cleveland Rocks is a song by Ian Hunter. Ian Hunter is Rock n Roll

Ian Hunter is not just a good Rock musician; he has gone beyond that and become the thing itself. He never got so big that he lost himself and never got so small that he became irrelevant. Endlessly skating away on the thin ice of rock music, day after day and year after year until he has produced an ocean of work. The closest example I can think is George Jones in country music because I would hear that said about him-“George is Country!”

So when Ian Hunter says Cleveland rocks-Cleveland Rocks!

Cleveland is not a glamour city and the same could be said for Liverpool –and if you go deeper, the same for a lot of the cities and places that serve as incubators for the disgruntled youth that gravitate to the outlet of rock music. Cleveland rocks.

Now the Chipmunk thing

Mott the Hoople with Ian Hunter put out one of the most iconic songs in Rock music-A David Bowie song known as “All the Young Dudes”. There is a part at the end of the song where he picks out a young dude in the audience and brings him down to the stage. The only criteria for this selection- this young dude in question must be wearing glasses.

I (self proclaimed rock blogger) as a young dude went to see Ian Hunter and had good seats along with the required eye wear (which I have worn my whole life)…And when he got to this part, he pointed me out of the audience and said “You there-with the glasses- I want you” then he smiled a smug smile and kept on rocking.

I, on the other hand was frozen like the proverbial chipmunk in front of a tree. (To my European readers who have never seen this little animal freeze when approached as if that somehow makes them completely invisible and safe, when in fact, it reveals them as cute and funny little creatures…forget Disney Land and shopping at Walmart-for a taste of America-go find yourself a chipmunk!)

Anyway, that was my reaction as I became part of a rock song for one brief shining moment in time while my buddy says to me…”Hey Wayne, he’s pointing to you”.

ian-hunter
Yes- I did a cartoon…caveoffame.com

I am making The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame a Wonder

When you look at the entire list of inductees-this place gets it right most of the time. And this place willed itself into existence from nothing. What more can you ask from Rock n Roll?

English: The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, Cleve...
English: The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, Cleveland, Ohio; architect: I. M. Pei (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Top 5 Cool Splash Songs about Swimming…Welcome Summer!

swimming-header-cave

I don’t care if it’s 37 degrees fahrenheit or 2 degrees celsius outside- Summer is here and let’s go swimming…and I got to sketch a little cartoon! (I will hold off on calling this an art blog for the moment)

5. MGMT. Electric Feel

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xpc5ny_mgmt-electric-feel_music?search_algo=2#.UaFTsECTiTM

Great vibe and great song. I don’t feel too bad that I am too old to be invited to this party with the cool kids, because to be honest…. I had no shot of going even when I was this age. I could have showed up with 100 dollar bills taped to my forehead and a case of good tequila under my arm and I still was not getting in (I may, however, have been instantly mugged). But, if I was this cool, this is where I would have loved to be, splashing in the Amazon and getting shocked like an electric eel !

4. B-52’s.Rock Lobster

The first release from those crazy guys and girls from the Athens scene and I was in love right from the beginning (They had me at “his earlobe falling in the deep”!). This is something an underground music-loving outsider could shake his money maker to! I was waiting for this and it was liberating to let go on that dance floor (thankfully no footage is available).

3.The Pixies. Where is my Mind

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xo9nl_pixies-where-is-my-mind_music#.UX-WjbWTiTM

I know I just wrote about this, but it is such a good song and deserves many replays. I have yet to regret the journey that this song takes me on. Having an existential experience while little fishes chase you around in the warm Caribbean ocean. How cool is that!

2.Metric. Breathing Underwater

I love the chorus “Is this my life? Am I breathing underwater?” – “I am a knife and you are the blade” or is it “I am the shovel and you are the spade?”

A twist on the fish out of water concept as we go with the “non-fish in water”….Yes, my mind is blown…Powwwww!!!

But it does not have to make sense to the conscious mind to connect to the unconscious mind and make you feel something down deep; and I mean really deep, where all life is transparent and freaky-looking and glows with weird bioluminescence.

And this song makes me feel better every time I hear it.

1.R.E.M Nightswimming

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x63odl_r-e-m-nightswimming-jools-holland_music?search_algo=2#.UaFSvkCTiTM

Summer is fading, innocence is fading, and youth is fading, so let’s take one more dip.

This is probably my favorite R.E.M tune. It does not destroy your vulnerability, but it does put you out there with it, drip-drying on the porch and hoping that the screen door was left unlocked.

The Lizard King rests…Wonder #4

Jim Morrison, lead singer of The Doors.
Jim Morrison, lead singer of The Doors. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Making my way through the Wonders of Rock music I decided I did not want any grave sites but one nudged its way in anyway.

The grave of Jim Morrison in Paris has become a phenomenon.  And is Wonder #4

It is not only rock music fans, but all get drawn to a place that holds a strange type of cultural and mystical attraction.

Why some things set fire to the imagination can’t always be explained.

 The fascination that the Doors and Jim Morrison continue to hold by casting a spells on fans in different generations is operating on a different plane of consciousness than just good music.

The Doors were the first band that I went back in time to get hooked on.

I did not grow up with them. And I am not alone in this.

Maybe there is something to the 4 year old witnessing death on the highway and feeling the spirit of the Shaman enter his body. (This is in that realm of -did this really happen or did something close to it happen and the memory gets twisted and tweaked over time until the by-product drives you over the edge?… Reaching god-like superstar status just before falling off the face of the earth) I am no psychologist but writing about Jim Morrison makes you think about altered states of mind.

I will suffer Paris to visit this place.

This does not seem like a nice relaxing stroll in a friendly charming city. I see Paris as teeming with tourists combined with local residents that could care less if we tourists help subsidize the quality croissants that they consume and will not help us find. It is going to be a fight through crowds in order to spend about 15 seconds at the resting place of the most romantic and wounded spirit of Rock Music. Rock stars may not go to Paris to die but poets and artists do and Jim Morrison was all of these.

English: Jim Morrison's grave in Paris, France...
English: Jim Morrison’s grave in Paris, France. Dansk: Jim Morrisons grave Paris. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Matthew Sweet.Divine Intervention

I am having one of those weeks when I feel the need for a good alternative agnostic power-pop gospel song with some killer guitar. I don’t want to get into a big religious debate in the cave-I just want to say that there are times when we all look for the stuff that got us this far and hope that it still works when we need to get a little farther down the road. This song always hits me that way…the opposite of R.E.M  Losing  My Religion.