Kiss my Ass

kiss-calmed-down

I do not like this band -if they never visit Cleveland to claim their place in Rock n’ Roll history; that is fine with me!

I was O.K. with the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame not allowing them in….

BUT…

I know the names:

Gene Simmons, Ace Frehley, Paul Stanley and Peter Criss

We all know those names and those are the names that the Hall of Fame accepted for induction.

There are a legion of fans still enlisted in the Kiss Army. They made enough records that you could cover an entire ocean and not let the fishes get any light…They are a raging success and deserve to be in no matter what us “serious” rock music fans think.

I mean, was the Ramones hit with Rock and Roll High School really any deeper than Rock and Roll all Nite?… Oh yeah-they were cool but Kiss was all flash.

They were really good flash-with smoke and make up and all the other stuff that made the kids go crazy.

Even the grown up kids. Even now.

But Kiss can’t get it together for the original four to play a couple songs for fans that have made them gods- Fans that have paid the mortgages on mansions and the insurance on fancy sports cars for years and years.

It is one night and a couple tunes- that will allow you guys to take this little carnival of fantasy on the road and laugh all the way to the bank for the rest of your days. It will allow 4 or 5 generations of your heirs to live like kings if they have any sense at all and not waste this wealth that your followers have bestowed on you.

But no—-Wha, wha wha…Gene Simmons wants everybody that ever pretended to be Ace Frehley and Peter Criss to play and be inducted because they are just as much of the Kiss experience.

And it seems that 3 or 4 fake Aces are too many Aces in the deck for the original Ace.

Whatever.

Could you please just give the fans what they want one more time?

Don’t make us haters right.

20 thoughts on “Kiss my Ass

  1. I never have understood Kiss. They seem equal parts parody of a rock band and a Broadway musical version of a rock band. Spinal Tap with a budget. With that being said, I guess they should be in the RRHOF since they were puzzlingly a huge part of rock music for a while. I know the four names, and I think the spectacle of Kiss performing with those four would be meaningful; however, I also think Kiss being what they are, as long as you get the makeup right…. who cares.

    1. Welcome to the cave Mike! And congrats on getting your boys in the RRHOF. Becoming a Kiss fan is always a permanent thing….maybe there is something dark and subliminal about those early records that cast an evil spell on all of you?

  2. I think my biggest pet peeve is entitlement and lack of appreciation. I don’t like their music whatsoever, but I knew the bands music with Ace and Peter. Your age doesn’t make you irrelevant but your ego sure does. They could easily do this set for their fans and they choose to make it all about themselves instead. It should say everything about the band right there. I don’t care how much commercial success they have had, they should not be inside the gate of the HOF if they are not going to suck it up and perform.

    1. The Sex Pistols called the hall a “piss stain” and refused to go. It seems that Mr Simmons wants to one up them and pee on the steps at the entrance. These inductions give each recipient the chance to show who they are and make the fans happy. I don’t know why they would not want to give back and cement a place in history for themselves.

      1. And on a side note-I made the banner with the pen tool in illustrator and it does not suck—“Does not suck” is the first level of competency-next comes “Good” and then we get to “friggin Awesome” …I am going to keep at it.

      2. Significant v. popular is the conundrum HOF shares with Grammys where POPular usually wins. No excuse for HOF tho’ as there has been enough time passed to honor the significant instead.
        Sadder than KISS are the groups that perform on the seniors circuit; “soandso and the whatevers,” or the “new whatevers” where one old guy who with with the original pre-Beatles pop group long after their last hit is the only hook to that time.
        Anyway thanks for liking “the lost hopper”—may I ask why? And good luck with illustrator; remember to click and drag in the direction you want to go while looking back at the path you are making.

      3. Nostalgia is an evil thing and nothing worse than going to a rock show knowing that the EMT’s have brushed up on bad hips and heart attacks instead of OD’s. The one original member that somehow got the rights to the band name reheating those old hits for the miserable surviving faithful is a pathetic thing…but it is what my blog is about so I try to make it fun!
        I love all your illustrations and thought it might be creepy of me to hit the like button on every post…which I easily could because they are consistently brilliant.

        Cheers from the cave!

  3. I’m well on record for being the biggest Kiss fan around, but you NAILED it.

    “It is one night and a couple tunes”

    Exactly. Nobody is asking for Ace and Peter to come back for good. We just want two grown men to act like adults for one night and play a couple songs with two other grown men — men that they used to describe as brothers.

    I’ll always be a Kiss fan, but it’s sad to see such a lack of maturity in my heroes.

    1. Reading how Gene Simmons is spinning this to try and not lose the fans is something. The fans know that it is not the RRHOF being ridiculous for not adding everyone who played with the band. The original four created this monster and the original four is what we want. Even me,

      1. I believe the original four, the late Eric Carr, and possibly Bruce Kulick should be inducted. But to not induct Eric Carr would be very unfortunate. He’s been slighted by the mainstream ever since Freddie Mercury had the gall to die on the same day.

        But also Kiss left out two names when they talked about who they think need to be recognized. They left off Vinnie Vincent who they have an even more vitriolic relationship with and Mark St. John who was only in the band for 6 months.

      2. It also occurs to me that this kind of drama may be part of the reason the Hall never inducted Kiss before. They may have anticipated this kind of chaos.

      3. Incidentally, this is the definitive discussion of the issue below. If you want the whole enchilada, it’s below. It’s clear that Hall have NO rules when it comes to induction. Check it out.

      4. Rock music (as those of us blogging about it know well) is subjective. I am sure die hard Fleetwood Mac fans are still upset that Bob Welch was not included with them..and that was only made worse with his tragic end. I feel they do some of that to placate the rock fans that don’t like this band or that band. Yeah, I guess they have to go in but don’t water down the honor by throwing everyone in with them.

      5. Yeah agreed. Don’t water it down. A guy who has only been in the band sporadically since 1991 doesn’t need to be in the HOF.

  4. This is probably a publicity stunt created by Gene Simmons who will somehow magically get an original line up performance together at the last minute. Or maybe he’s just waiting for some poor unwitting fan to pop out of nowhere and say, “Look man, I’ll give you like a million dollars to perform with Ace and Peter at the Rock N’ Roll Hall of Fame.” And there will be Gene, pen and contract in hand.

    1. It is sad, the typical want my cake and eat it to and also could you add in a pie so I can hit Ace in the face. The fans will get no dessert. I really do feel bad for the fans.

    2. I think the truth of it is that Gene and Paul are terrified of performing with Ace and Peter, because of the hype it would create. They clearly do not want Ace and Peter back in the band, and the demand for a reunion tour would be very high after a Hall of Fame reunion. They make plenty of money now by paying hired musicians, so why would Gene want a reunion? You can be guaranteed he’s done the math. Kiss do more business without Ace and Peter because they can work twice as much as well.

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