The – I’m ok but figuring it out post.
The posts on the Cave are slowing down a bit because I am rebuilding my life….
I am here people and I am writing and sketching, I am a little behind – I may be down to once a week with posts while I catch up with my life.
I have so much to do and I am happy to say I am doing it.
If you see a lag in response or I don’t get to your blogs and visit as much — I will — just be patient – we all run into this blog/life balance issue.
Some good news:
The Night Swimming site where I deal almost 100% with the intimate and heart wrenching subject of cancer and grief is going well – I am writing it out and it is helping me. I am not going to mix the two blogs, most of you don’t want to see that side me, and if it was totally public – I would not feel free enough to share – — so email me for a link if you are brave enough — I thank the few of you that have – it has been good on many levels.
Working out at the Y for the last three months is bringing my physical health back in line – I am getting my strength and wellness back!
I started some therapy for my mental health – I am happy to say I carry a lighter mind. To talk fully with no restrictions to someone who is legally bound not to share — I can’t express how 3 years of cancer and losing a soulmate almost requires that you do this. If this is you — do not walk to get help — run.
Spiritually, I am in a state of reflection and expansion – I am not ruling anything out as I keep my heart and my mind open. I am Christian but I will be honest and tell you that I leaned heavily on Buddhism during my wife’s illness. Am I getting an orange robe and shaving my head? No, not yet – but universal truth is universal truth and close mindedness is the route of much evil in this world. When you are pushing around a dying wife in a wheelchair, you take and do whatever you can to help, you do not check the label on gifts of love before you open them. Love is love. Truth is truth. Light is light.
My house is falling apart and needs much work – that must start soon.
My past job is done, right now I have no work to go to. I have a new job lined up for Jan of 2017 – I may not go back to a “real” job until then. Is this a problem? No, not at all.
And lastly – I bought myself a new acoustic guitar and started playing a little — I’m not terrible – I am not going to be a rock star but, so what! – it gives me pleasure – it lifts my soul.
This is where I am – And now – some music.
17 thoughts on “The – I’m ok but figuring it out post.”
I admire you for being so courageous. Keep it up!
Thank you – we are going the right direction. 🙂
Glad to hear you’re playing some guitar – for fun, for that uplifting feeling, that’s the best way to play!
Working on a few songs for a summer BBQ Geoff – I think I pass the “drunk test” for musical appreciation right now – a little more work so the sober people can enjoy it! 🙂
Thank you for sharing your figuring-out story. It’s good that you are finding help. I am especially interested in your comments about Christianity and Buddhism because people who are mystics sometimes transcend their original traditions and become interested in interspirituality.
https://caveoffame.com/2015/03/14/buddhism-and-accepting-my-ox-ness/ this post might help a little to explain – at this stage of my life everything has been removed and I am taking care to put it back together with the right stuff – not the stuff i did because i always did it — but what works – what will get me through my next chapter correctly — And thanks for reading and commenting Joanne!
Thank you for sharing the link to your prior post. I am new here and had not seen it. It is wonderful when a spiritual message reaches us when we need it the most and are open to it.
Thank you – it seems like I start everyday new – discovering things each moment … Thanks for reading and welcome to the cave Joanne
My thoughts are with you, keep the faith.
I am so glad you are getting stronger in both mind and body. I envy yet admire the love you shared with your wife. If my Mr Ex was as loving and kind as you…he would be a keeper! But it takes two and I guess I was less tolerant too ha ha! I have faith that you will grow in strength and knowing that your wife is loving you everyday from above as you heal! Stay chipper Wayne and have a peaceful and happy weekend 😊
Thanks GH – Yes, I am those two things I hope – but don’t forget funny – I am that as well. 🙂
Yes you are funny too 😀
This is a heart warmer, Wayne. Moving in all the right directions. Making it on your own terms. Yeah!
Thank you Lois!
You ROCK dude!