We are writers! ~non writing part 2

enimien22

So many intelligent and thoughtful responses to my question on writing – I felt a follow up was in order.

I have come to some conclusions about this crazy act of blogging.

It takes a little guts to just “stand up and spit”  (sorry, Eminem mode)

 We go from the big three things stuck in our head –

  1. I have something to say.
  2. I need to get something off my chest.
  3. I want to connect with like-minded others.

TO:

  1. I said it
  2. It’s gone
  3. Hello

Those three things happen the instant we hit the publish button.

Some of my more cynical readers might say – I’ll give you the first two caveman – but the third? No interaction by hitting publish – no likes, no comments, no nothing.

Wrong – wrong and wrong

The moment your thoughts are out – you have made a connection – You have taken stuff from your brain and published it.

It is out there — you do not own it anymore — anyone that reads it could have a reaction you will never know about. You have no idea

Yes, every blogger ~ even the “much maligned” food blogger* can connect.

Imagine a family that had the “best damn apple blueberry turnover” (recipe from a food blog) – and eating that turnover moved Grandma so much that she finally told everyone where the 36 gold bars were buried on the old family farm — which led to a very generous offer on that property for the current owners…. which made their day because they wanted to move to Nebraska anyway. (why anybody would move to Nebraska is a question that can’t be answered in the limited space of this post!)

Isn’t that a beautiful story – an entire family united together in common greed – it warms the heart.

But we don’t know the situation of each family member.

And we don’t know the good that could come from getting out of debt and thriving instead of surviving.

We don’t know what will happen with a post.

That is both scary and exhilarating.

So keep spitting it out on-line

This requires at least a Part 3

Cheers from the Cave!

 

 

*Yes people – food bloggers are bloggers too – it does not matter what the subject of a blog is – all bloggers are relevant if the content is interesting and the writer is passionate – a food blogger can hit this mark.  In fact -If I, the Cave Guy, started a food web site — do you think it would be boring?

Notes: Good rappers take brutal honesty about their life – package it to their fans with rhyme and beat –  And connection happens – They don’t know what their music will do —-BUT – connection is made.

Good bloggers take brutal honesty about their life – package it with words and images  to their readers – And connection happens —– etc….etc…etc…

We are more alike than not alike.

I thank everyone for the great comments and will do my best to visit your home on the web and reciprocate — because that is what this is all about!

Intentions

I talked about writing and then I stumbled here – I am not a big re-blogger, but this is too perfect not to be read.

Word Curator

As I melted metal and struck flux gassed arcs, you cut into me and it felt good.  I liked to just watch you, to observe and the more I watched, the more I felt. I couldn’t help it or explain it. I did not want you in that sense. I just wanted to behold you, like a fragile beautiful thing, that cannot be touched.  I knew I would ruin you, so I kept my distance. I knew you would burn me, so I kept away, but I just wanted to get a bit closer, so I could see every detail of beauty.

You see, I  destroy things. If you were flawed and ugly, like me, you would have reason to run.  I always have liked things that are so messed up, that no one else wants them.  I like to take them in, try and fix them, and when my…

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The Cave began as a “Project”

 

sid&nancy

A non-writer speaks of writing and influence

If Sid Vicious considered himself a bass player then I will consider myself a writer.

He snarled and spit, he raged, he fell down on his face — but he somehow got the job done (sort of).

[ I know — perhaps the most tragic figure in rock music who put the most brutal spin on Romeo and Juliet ]

BUT – THAT IS FOR ANOTHER BLOG —– THIS IS ABOUT WRITING.

 

I would not be here without my adventures at community college a few short years ago. This blog actually started as a project in a web design class! –  And Still going — Yes, I was forced to create a web presence for a grade! I admit it — I come from academia!!! (jk)

A shout out to my English Professor at the same unnamed institution — who somehow took my mangle of a brain and got it to play nice enough to express myself. More important than that – it gave me the confidence to write.

You think confidence is a small thing?—- It is the key that opens a FULFILLING LIFE!!!! –

So here I am – rock you like a hurricane

Back to this blog:

We all “grunt and sweat under a weary life”

Friggin’  – “Wild Bill Shakeman”  himself or if you need to cite it accurately:

William Shakespeare

“For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,

Th’ oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely

The pangs of despised love, the law’s delay,

The insolence of office, and the spurns

That patient merit of th’ unworthy takes,

When he himself might his quietus make”

Writing should move your mind – it should give you a kick —it should make you think!

When I read Shakespeare, I understand what words can do – I don’t understand how he hits the mark – but I marvel at the deadly precision.

writercircle-1

“They were watching, out there past men’s knowing, where stars are drowning and whales ferry their vast souls through the black and seamless sea.”

Or:

“War was always here. Before man was, war waited for him. The ultimate trade awaiting its ultimate practitioner.”

Cormac McCarthy can flat out write! If you think you are a writer – go read Blood Meridian and then you will quickly realize how far you have to go.

I have far to go———–

So those three would be my biggest influences if I could be so arrogant to claim any.

Sid Vicious – because he just went for it with no restrictions – Shakespeare because he is Shakespeare, and Cormac McCarthy because his words stir my soul.

One more thing:

Keeping this blog going has made me better – every post and every week – I get stronger.

I am a better writer because I write.

That is part of why those of us who are afflicted with this disease don’t stop – there is a certain rush with jamming words together and making it work.

I am sick with this.

I welcome thoughts:

How many of my fellow bloggers consider themselves writers and what do you guys think of writing?

And maybe more important: Why did you step out and start a blog?

Disclaimer:

[ I talk about the sweet spot, I talk about the triumph of great posts — this post may well fall flat on its face like a drunken Sid – I gave it all I got – can do no more – we hit the publish button and wait ]

 

 

“Naked” site active.

divein

New “naked” incognito site is active.

I know there are two moons in this illustration from my notebook…. so my question to you … Mr. or Ms. typical blogging friend.

Do you want to see my naked thoughts?

I will be brutally honest and tell you: this is not an enticing web address.

This is bare-brutal-raw stuff that oozes from my mind as I deal with the grieving and transition process from losing my soul mate.

I need to get it out — and it is not pretty.  It may not even be that good.

I was hoping for 70% self-wallowing drivel mixed with 30% humor and philosophy.

I thought that was a low enough barrier to hit.

I am running about 95/5 now – so this thing is not road ready.

——————————————————————————————————————————————

The idea is an outlet site for the intense personal stuff – so that the cave can get back to being the cave.

Full of fun, photos, art, and music along with the witty banter you all have come to know and love.

I like that guy too! In fact, I am that guy! I need to let that guy live and breathe and dance again.

Right now I am both guys at once.

And I don’t think it is fair to you, my web friends, to slog over the same ground – just plowing and re-plowing – with no planting and no reaping anywhere on the horizon.  Grief is like that.

The new site is tucked away in a dark corner on WordPress – I am not going to add a link here.

If you are smart and know me — you can probably find it — but then again, maybe not. (there are a crap load of web sites out here folks!)

Some of the posts will be password protected because of sensitivity (at least right now). This is ground that I am not willing to let a casual passerby waltz in the door and see.

An example of what I mean  — The Groundhog Day post is Cave material — Walking on Ice is best on the new site and would not need a password.

My giant big picture hope is that the new site can be polished into something that will help others going through similar loss. Because I think it is needed— All —  I mean all grief sites are heavy religious behemoths that always make you feel worse. That is a friggin’ crime and injustice to humanity!!!

So if you are brave enough to splash in this water with me —Please email me from the gmail address on this page and I will send you the link.

Thank you my friends (and I did use a cartoon double for my butt shot, I mean,… hey!, I got a reputation to preserve….right?)

Cheers from the Cave!

 

 

 

 

 

Walking on water is faith

icewalkingWhile I was walking on Mirror Lake –  I was thinking   “wow’ – this is cool – this is like …  ice on a wound.

Maybe “wow” is not the right word – How about “whoa!”

The snow was fluttering down like at the end of a Hollywood blockbuster.

Big Flakes – big fluffy formations that will melt in your mouth if you just open up to receive this frozen manna from the heavens.

And I did

I don’t care who is watching and I don’t care what anybody thinks – I am walking on a frozen lake in a snow squall and I am….

I am …

Walking in faith

Walking on water is always that – and walking on a frozen lake is walking on water.

 

I know from the science that water freezes at 32 degrees F or Zero degrees C. And while that freezing takes place the temperature remains the same.

If you put a thermometer in a glass on freezing water it will be exactly zero.

But something amazing is happening —TRANSFORMATION

I am working through this grieving process which frequently leads me to still places in my mind — and still water has this soothing effect.

Not stagnant water (there is a difference, believe me,  spent enough time swimming in that!) — This is calm, pristine and renewing water.

Nothing is more still than frozen – nothing more pristine than a mountain lake and nothing more like walking to a renewed shore than walking on water.

I am the same – but transformation is happening.

And yeah that was yesterday in Lake Placid (of all places)

[I am not making this up -I am just trying to live my life]

 

 

 

 

Night Swimming – under the radar

nightswiming

I am thinking of going anonymous with a hidden blog so I can swim a little further out – there is stuff I can’t share with my friends – there is stuff I can’t share with anybody I know. (or more accurately: anybody that knows me)

When I say can’t~

I guess I can.

No – don’t think so.

What stuff we talking about cave guy? – you are a free sharer on your blog and on your Facebook. Some might say a nauseating over-purveyor of pics and sayings and all kinds of crap.

No – I am not.

Because I am conscious of the audience – on Facebook there are lots of kids —including my kids.

And on WordPress there are lots of … well everybody …. including an occasional visit from my mom.

Does that limit me or is the censorship a curb that keeps my insanity digestible?

So a question to my anonymous friends out there.

What do you think?

Does it help you to keep a veil between you and us?

I am not talking about “coming out” but “going in”.

Like a skinny dip in the pool at night with no one watching. (see- should I even say that? A bit edgy don’t you think, but then again —at my age and physique coupled with my pedestrian appearance – is anybody really going to be intrigued?)

Note:

This picture was taken at daybreak last February at the infinity pool in Cancun! Loved that trip!

 

Groundhog Day – My Favorite Holiday

cave-groundhog

Groundhog day (German-Penn) evolved from Candlemas Day (Christian) – which evolved from Imbolc (Celtic) —-  which evolved from a few cave guys knowing they were passing the mid-point of winter and needing to jump around and do something.

“Stoke up the fire  – it’s ON!!!”

“If Candlemas Day is bright and clear,

There’ll be twa winters in the year.”

This is an old Scottish poem about February 2nd – Twa means 2  

Basically saying that if the sun is shining on this day then winter will be longer.

candlemas

Candlemas – A mass of candles – all the candles in the church were fired up to help bring light and hope to winter wary folk. There is also a 40 days after this or the other with the virgin Mary and some other mumbo jumbo to help validate it.

– which make me a wee bit suspicious.

 Because they needed to add more validation – they were trying extra hard to secure a claim.

 

bridget

On the left is the Saint Brigit and on the right is the Celtic goddess Brigid – Notice anything similar in these incredible hastily done illustrations?

Thig an nathair as an toll
Là donn Brìde,
Ged robh trì troighean dhen t-sneachd
Air leac an làir.
The serpent will come from the hole
On the brown Day of Bríde,
Though there should be three feet of snow
On the flat surface of the ground.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brigid

They both carry the fire of spring.

The ancient pagan festival of Imbolc in honor of this goddess of early spring is celebrated on February 2nd (it includes a little weather prognostication) – Christianity kept her fire and made her the Irish Patron Saint Brigit who has her day on February 1st.

I am totally OK with the practice of stamping  new traditions on old ones – this one is very cool because aside from replacing the wild hair with a halo – they keep the entire package together.

Anyway- moving on to my debilitated history mixed with folklore.

 

The groundhog or ~ ah ~ hedgehog or bear or badgerhog7

Somehow a rodent got in the mix—-blame it on the Romans – blame it on an over zealous priest or wizard – blame it on what you want – there are a few different theories.

But at the base of it all – It’s a simple evolution of the “sunny weather or cloudy weather” theme — turning into “see my shadow” because that is far more poetic.

The hedgehog is in the mix—can also substitute a badger or bear in a pinch, if that is what you have lying around the house.

The Germans later settled in Pennsylvania and found no hedgehogs —but lots and lots of groundhogs.

So here we go with a very sketchy explanation of how we arrive at  Punxsutawney Phil.

Disclaimer: I cannot defend my last few statements with any reference material whatsoever – please believe or not believe at you own risk.

Taking liberties from “see my shadow” to “I am a rodent that can only tell the guy with the tallest black hat what the future holds” — is all Punxsutawney shabby theater —and take it from this blogger – Well worth the trip!

me-sign

 From an old English poem:

If Candlemas be fair and bright,
Come, Winter, have another flight;
If Candlemas brings clouds and rain,
Go Winter, and come not again.

http://www.groundhog.org/about/history/

The basic theme is always the same —- a nice sunny day  – be careful! Don’t to be lulled.

And a cloudy stormy day  — take heed – spring may arrive sooner than you think.

Either way – Winter is coming to an end and we are looking forward to the next season.

This is the turning point – we are on the way out of the darkness and the cold.

I love this day.

Happy Groundhog day to all!

[All accidental illustrations done by me, if you would like to use any (really can’t think why) just ask me]

 

 

 

 

Lone Tree

lone-tree

 

This is a forgotten image I stumbled on while organizing all the graphic stuff on my computer. And I mean ALL…all pictures, all Photoshop, all Illustrator, even my pathetic little 2 month bender with Flash (what tragic and flawed “train wreck” animation I spewed to life!)

Anyway – this tree does pack some emotional punch but it is not an accurate representation of my well-being (At least not all the time).

Grief is a miserable selfish bastard that is often cyclical and pathetic. It wants to throw you down and reopen wounds to rub in doubt every chance it can.

But even knowing the useless and often self-wallowing walrus that you are becoming to everyone (including yourself).

You still have to keep dancing with this beast until??………..[I don’t know the answer]

I am out on the floor – but I am ok.

Muted Cheers from the cave.

David Bowie

redneck-stardust-1112

Ziggy Stardust

ziggysd

I was 11 and I was a little boy in England — I was not a happy child – I was an intense and deep thinking young dude.

Music was not a thing to me.

I sorta liked the Beatles and T-rex and Slade (ok, I did like Slade)

But – I didn’t have anything to really connect me.

——– Until the day I would not forget

“Spiders from Mars” arrived at the house.

And it was the Album Cover that mesmerized me.

This was a weak-artsy–deep-thinking-cool-dude. And he had arrived.

The impact of this cover and that day stays with me.

And it had nothing to do with the music – it was this persona – this image —– This ballsy statement of — “I am here, deal with it”

We were waiting for you – This was my pied piper moment – I was hypnotized.

It was my streets with some amazing shift of culture.

If this was ok then I could be ok — We, the new generation had arrived.

This is my last good memory of England; we would soon move to the United States – Ironically – I now live within striking distance from where David Bowie had a home in Woodstock.

This is my upstate NY homage to my hero – yeah…I am not a young dude anymore – And I live in a redneck land.

We become ok with our surroundings and our place in this world or we do not.

David Bowie helped me understand that.

Cheers from the cave!

Just in case you missed what a sublime sense of humor he had.

 

Skate = Joy

My blades hit the ice and I am free – even though I am weaving in and out and around masses of inept humanity —

I am free

Even though I am old and rusty

I am free

You people don’t understand – you 4 or 5 better skaters out here that seem to be taunting me

I am free

You can’t contain me – you can’t diminish me

I am free

 

Thanks to my kids for dragging me down to the rink. Something happens when I get out on the ice – my spirit tends to soar, not just a little – but completely. I don’t care what anyone thinks about it—-

And to know it still happens, …. Even now, when I am feeling a bit “relicly” and a bit “used up”.

It is a cold fact that I am beat-up and in recovery mode.

But not on the ice

On frozen water

I am free.

[Disclaimer: I am a 50+ dinosaur from another age with semi-blunt skates that are half my age – I may have a diminished skill set—–but the SWAG —-oh yeah —- that is intact]

Cheers from the ice!